Posts Tagged ‘James’

The Trial of Mike “Blackbeard” Leach

July 23rd, 2010

               The Trial Of Mike "Blackbeard" Leach

The wrongful dismissal trial of Coach Mike Leach vs. Texas Tech has going on behind closed doors but, if you’re like us, you can’t wait for the jury to be involved. Plus we expect Coach Leach would like to get it over with for if we know anything about pirates, it is this: pirates aren’t patient.

And if we learned anything about Leach, we know he likes pirates... and if he could be one, he would. What if the trial were still going on on September 19th or “Talk Like a Pirate Day”? What if Mike Leach was able to have a jury of his peers? What if when Leach took the stand on that day he spoke as a pirate? See below:  

Lawyer: We see you’re dressed in seafaring garb, Mr. Leach. Do you feel you were wronged by Texas Tech?

L each: Aye, matey!  They came for me doubloons!

Lawyer: But they said you sequestered a player against his wishes.

Leach: Lies, they be. All lies. Landlubber talk! Belay ye landlubber talk, me hearty.

Lawyer: But they said you took young master James and put him in a dark room.

Leach: Shiver me timbers! He be lucky he weren’t keelhauled from the poopdeck.

Lawyer: So you sent him into the dark room as a punishment?

Leach: ‘ave ye be nippin’ on a noggin’ o’ rum, ‘ave ye? All scurvy scallywags walk ye plank. We didn’t send James to Davy Jones locker. We kep’ him cool ‘n dark fer ‘is own good.

Lawyer: So ye…er… you did place him in the dark?

Leach: ‘ave ye no ears? We run no school fer milksops! Football be our game ‘n it be no game fer yellow-bellied sapsuckers or fat little wenches. Do ye savvy, or arrrre ye a landlubber?

Lawyer: I’m no land… er, strike that. So you did lock up Mr. James?

Leach: Never said lock, me hearty. Fer ‘is own good, we placed ‘im. Arrrrgh? This squabble has little to do wit Adam James. The cheap bastards be tryin’ not to pay me my booty.   

Lawyer: So you think the James matter is a straw dog?

Leach: Avast! Do not speak o’ dog, ya pompous gasbag. Grog, aye. Dog, nay. We had an agreement, aye. I win games and they pay me plunder.

Lawyer: Young James was cleared to practice and came in sunglasses. Why remove him?

Leach: Arrrgh! We be in Lubbock. Sunglasses are fer wussywogs. Eye patches, ya mangy cockroach, don’t ye see? Eye patches fer all! If’n I let one lad go wuss, they all go wuss.
The Trial Of Mike "Blackbeard" Leach by Stan Silliman humor sports comedy cartoons articles
Lawyer: Judge, could you make the witness stop talking like a pirate?

Leach: (standing): No can do, ye lilly-livered landlubber. I ought draw me musket on ye just fer askin’. Give me my doubloons and I be sailin’ out o’ here. 
Lawyer: Judge, this is too much. Please instruct the witness…

Leach: He’s a lubber, Judge. Don’t ye listen to that scurvy bilge rat! He’s tryin’ to take me hawse. I did no wrong. I’m Michael “Blackbeard” Leach. They all be rogues a-plotting. I’m Michael “Blackbeard” Leach and I’m a better man than all ye milksops put together!

Lawyer: Judge, he’s pulled a sword on me! Judge! Judge! Eyyyowwwwww…..


Miami Heat: Five Reasons “The Answer” Will Not Join the Big Three

July 23rd, 2010

In his prime, Allen Iverson was among the best players in the NBA. His 11 All-Star appearances, four scoring titles, and MVP award have convinced many he could still have a role in the NBA.

However, that role will not be with the Miami Heat.

Here's why.


5. Iverson's Troubled Past

Off the court, Iverson's life has been marred by drama.

Iverson's first arrest came in 1993, before he was even drafted in the NBA, for his part in a brawl spurred by racial tension. He was sentenced to five years in prison, but the conviction was eventually overturned.

Iverson was again arrested in 1997 for possession of a concealed firearm and marijuana after a traffic stop for speeding. This time, he was sentenced to community service.

Throughout the 2000s, Iverson has had run-ins with authority everywhere from casinos to nightclubs. A Philadelphia Inquirer article by Stephen A. Smith, published March 7, 2020, stated that Iverson's friends believed Iverson would either "drink himself into oblivion or gamble his life away."

Does that sound like the kind of guy Pat Riley wants to have in the locker room of a potential championship team? Doubtful. Highly doubtful.

4. Iverson's Inability to Accept a Bench Role

Three teams, three seasons, three "retirements."

When Detroit asked Iverson to come off the bench, Iverson told them he rather retire than be a bench player. Instead, Detroit deactivated him for the remainder of the season due to a "back injury."

The following season, Iverson attempted a comeback with the Memphis Grizzlies. But the same problem arose; Iverson was not willing to come off the bench. Iverson would eventually leave the team in November due to "personal reasons."

Not having learned from Iverson's previous seasons, the 76ers decided to give him another try in in December of 2009. By February 2010, Iverson had again left a team mid-season, this time for family issues.

The major problem here is that the Heat obviously do not have a starting job to offer A.I. Taking it a step further, the Heat do not even have minutes to offer him.


3. Iverson's Personality

Somehow, Allen Iverson has failed to realize that he is no longer the player who won the MVP award nearly 10 years ago.

Prior to his return in 2009, Iverson told Stephen A. Smith "...I can still compete at the highest level."

Iverson fails to realize he is no longer one of the best, and his inability to accept that would clash heavily with this Heat squad.

A team where three superstars were willing to sacrifice their own superstardom to co-exist on one team? Iverson would never be able to comprehend that. Worst part is it would be no surprise if Iverson told the media he was an equivalent to the three superstars in talent.

Iverson would not fit in a locker room where players are willing to take pay cuts and make sacrifices for the greater good of the team. The last few years have proven that.

2. Carlos Arroyo and Mario Chalmers

With the addition of Arroyo to the Heat's roster, Riley eliminated any need for another point guard. This not only indicated that the Heat had no interest in Iverson, but also that talks with Jason Williams had sizzled. 

Arroyo was second in the NBA in assist-to-turnover ratio in the 2009-2010 season. While the starting job was Chalmers' to lose, Arroyo ate significantly into his minutes as the season progressed.

To begin the 2010-2011 season the Heat have said the point guard job is again Chalmers' to lose. If the Heat are guaranteeing minutes to Chalmers, then there is absolutely no role left for Iverson on this team. I highly doubt that Arroyo is willing, or expecting to, take minimal minutes on this Heat team.

Especially considering that the Heat will more than likely run several setups with LeBron James and Dwyane Wade at the point.


1. Iverson's Hatred of Practice

This video explains it better than I ever could.

If you didn't count, Iverson just explained how lowly he thinks of practice 20 different ways in two minutes. 

That seems to clash with the Pat Riley mantra "A champion needs motivation above and beyond winning." 


If you still aren't convinced the Heat will not sign Iverson, drop me a comment with your wager. 

Kevin Durant: The Future Face of the NBA

July 23rd, 2010


That's the most important aspect of an athlete's career.

As an athlete, myself, I can somewhat relate to these big-time athletes in the NBA, NFL, or MLB. All athletes dream of one day being remembered as the G.O.A.T. (Greatest of All Time) in their respective sports, whether it be in the game of basketball or as simple as being remembered as the best hitter in their local Brooklyn neighborhood.

The world has always been built around competition. Who has the most money? Who has the biggest home? Who will get the next promotion? Who has the best BBQs every year?

All of these questions are asked around the world in some sense and it is the nature of this "dog eat dog" type world.

Now in the future absence of Kobe Bryant, the NBA needs someone to rightfully take over the title of, "The Best in the NBA."

LeBron James going to Miami has diminished his chances of doing so. LeBron may make ESPN every night, but as you can start to see, that means nothing in the matters of leaving behind a legacy.

Think of all the great players that have left behind legacies in the past. Starting back from Jerry West, Bill Russell, Wilt Chamberlain, going onto Magic Johnson, Larry Bird, Michael Jordan, and now to Kobe Bryant. They have all also won a championship, which may come to Durant in the future—you never know.

As you can see, all of these players have not only been remembered as being the best in their time but for what they did in the time that they played.

Jerry West, as you know, is still the logo of the NBA, Bill Russell still holds the most championships as a player, Wilt Chamberlain still holds his most points scored in a single game record, Magic Johnson and Kareem Abdul-Jabbar are remembered for their unstoppable Show Time Lakers performances back in the '80s, and Michael Jordan, well we all know what he continues to provide for the NBA.

In this short list of great players you can see a trend. The trend is that there must be an iconic player in every era of basketball. That time is nearing for the NBA and I can only think of one possible candidate and that is the "Durantula," or Kevin Durant of the Oklahoma City Thunder.

As time progresses, so does Durant. It seems as though Durant has matured into a man before most superstars do. Durant is arguably the best player in the game right now next to Kobe and LeBron, and no one can argue about his potential and skills at his age.

The most underrated aspect of a player is his leadership ability, and Durant has shown and proven to the world that he can lead a young team anywhere he wants to go.

I'd say that's a great start for Durant—most players aren't born with that leadership mentality, and Durant obviously has the “it” factor.

Kevin Durant, the 6'10'', 230 pound forward out of Texas has done nothing but amaze us NBA fans. Durant has already won an NBA scoring title and he has even won a NBA Horse Champion Trophy.

More importantly, Durant has led the youngest team in the NBA to unexpected territory.

In this year's playoff series against the Los Angeles Lakers, Durant led his team to a point where it could have taken down the "Goliath" of the playoffs.

Durant's Thunder had a tough 4-2 series loss to the Lakers, but everyone knows it was much closer than that. If a couple of plays went the Thunder's way, it could have been a completely different story.

Now where does this leave Kevin Durant?

He agreed to a five-year extension with the Thunder this offseason and everyone is expecting the Thunder to keep improving. Like I said, because LeBron chose to cop out and go to Miami, this leaves Durant a slight opening of the door to take the NBA by his hands.

All great players who have left legacies behind have never left their teams in order to win. That's why they were great. These MJ's and Kobe's could figure out a way to win in any type of situation.

That is why LeBron can never leave a legacy behind, because he has decided to take the "easy" way out. Lebron may win multiple championships with the Heat in the future, but what is more impressive, LeBron winning with two possible Hall of Famers or Durant winning and leading a team to Oklahoma City's first championship?

I hope you chose Durant.

Durant, on the other hand chose to stay with his original team and he is preparing to lead his Thunder team to a future NBA Finals appearance.

On a side note, Durant, as coach Mike Krzyzewski has announced, is going to be the leader of this year's U.S. National Team. After hearing what Coach K. has to say about Durant, Durant responded by humbly saying, "I doubt I'm the next face; I'm just another guy helping to bring a gold back to the U.S. It's been a dream of mine since I was a little kid."

Now that's what I call being humble. Durant has the full background to become the NBA's next iconic player. As always time will only tell but it looks to me that the NBA has found it's new "face," if you will.


The NBA Legends Are Ganging Up On LeBron

July 23rd, 2010

You have to believe that LeBron James is extremely pumped up for the season to start. You also have to believe that all of the heat and criticism he has been getting since his controversial decision is only going to motivate him to the highest degree.

As you can see, the old farts, Magic Johnson, Larry Bird and Michael Jordan, are on a LeBron rampage. Clearly, they are very jealous and envious of the fact that the opportunity to play together just never presented itself.

The NBA legends need to stop hating on the big three in Miami and need to stop trying to steal the spotlight in order to satisfy their egos. Their time for glory and greatness is over. If anything, they should be respecting and admiring LeBron's decision.

LeBron had an old school mentality when contemplating which team to ultimately sign with. His decision proved that he chose winning over everything else. He reached the conclusion that nothing was more important than winning. How can you criticize him for wanting to win and for wanting to be part of a potential dynasty?

LeBron's decision was truly selfless. He left some money on the table to sign with the Heat and he showed that he was willing to sacrifice his stats and personal achievements in order to accomplish true greatness. His decision is emblematic of the fact that a team's accomplishments can mean a lot more to an individual compared to personal accomplishments such as records and All Star numbers.

Also his decision was both remarkable and unprecedented. This is the first time in NBA history where three great players have decided to team up together via Free Agency.  

Collective psychology is based on the fact that it is a lot more exciting to accomplish great things with a group of individuals who you love and respect, rather than doing it all by yourself.

You can't tell me that Jordan, Bird and Magic would not have teamed up together if they were given the opportunity.

Don't forget that these three legends had plenty of talent around them as well. Magic had Kareem and James Worthy. Jordan had his Pippen and Dennis Rodman. Bird had Kevin Mchale and Robert Parrish.

The game has evolved exponentially since the 80's and 90's. There had never been a free agent class with as much star power as this one. Also, there had never been a Free Agency in professional sports with so much hype, excitement and expectancy.

Jordan, Bird and Magic must have known that something off the charts and completely mind boggling was going to occur. At the end of the day, LeBron was a Free Agent who honored his contract. Therefore, he owed the Cavaliers and the city of Cleveland absolutely nothing.

The bottom-line is that the Cavaliers failed to build a championship caliber team around the King. Were the Cavaliers committed to excellence? Definitely! Did they try to get talent around him? Absolutely! However, when it was all said and done, they failed to help LeBron win a championship.

LebBon became sick and tired of carrying a franchise on his back for seven straight years. He wanted to go to a team where he could win immediately. He did not want his future legacy to reflect zero championship rings.

Moreover, you cannot question LeBron's competitive drive. It drives me crazy every time I hear someone criticize his competitiveness. Isn't having a tremendous desire to win multiple championships emblematic of a player's competitive fire? Winning is what truly defines competitiveness.

LeBron, Dwayne Wade and Chris Bosh still have to go through Kobe Bryant and the Lakers, the experienced Boston Celtics and the deeply talented Orlando Magic. It is not like LeBron is trying to eliminate the competition. There is still plenty of competition in the NBA. Competitiveness is not just about beating another player or being better than someone else.

At the end of the day, LeBron did what was best for LeBron.. He ensured his personal happiness and success for the future.


Women’s Wrestling: WWE and TNA’s Lack Of Focus

July 23rd, 2010

Women‘s wrestling. At one time considered a novelty act in the business, women’s wrestling over the last ten years has evolved into a more legitimate part of the sport. Once, fans turned the channel when the women’s match started. But thanks to a handful of stand outs in the women’s division, fans instead began tuning in.

But that was then. This is now.

Women’s wrestling is struggling, especially in this country’s two big promotions, the WWE and TNA.

It’s bad. It’s been bad for a while, and there doesn’t look to be a lot of hope for the future.

The truth is, TNA shouldn’t even be having this problem. After all, the talent level in the Knockouts division has always been above par, with some of the brightest stars women’s wrestling has seen in years.

There is a Knockouts Championship, even Knockouts Tag Team Titles. The matches are there, the angles are there, so what exactly is the issue?

Part of the problem seems to be that TNA has lost the focus on the Knockouts.

The women’s matches were once heavily featured on IMPACT, but since the birth of the Hogan and Bischoff era, that has changed. Now, with the emphasis being on the big names continuing to enter the company, the women seem to have been lost in the shuffle.

TNA is doing what it needs to do in order to become a competitive wrestling promotion. That means pushing the men, wrestlers who have automatic face and name recognition with fans. I understand that and appreciate where they’re trying to go as a company.

But the Knockouts division, at one time, separated TNA from the WWE, with the spotlight being on the wrestling instead of the physical attributes of the women involved.

The one exception to this, of course, are The Beautiful People, who have always been singled out because of their massive sex appeal.

In other words, they wear next to nothing and grind the middle rope as they enter the ring.

It’s a shame really, because the women in The Beautiful People can work. But now, even accepting the fact that their gimmick calls for risqué behavior, these women are a hard sell.

The sad fact is that the only way TNA sees fit in putting The Beautiful People over are by putting them at odds with each other. They have been reduced to using foul language and constantly referring to their highly touted breast implants.

Seriously, how many times can you say the word b***h in one spot? These girls are better than this.

The Diva division in the WWE is also struggling, and for me it all goes back to one person. Mickie James.

She was the heir apparent to carry the division in the WWE after Trish Stratus left the company in 2006, and did so until this year. It came as quite a surprise to many fans that she was released, as she still seemed to be at the top of her game.

But supposed attitude issues backstage and her weight led the company to decide that Mickie’s services were no longer required.

That’s right. In addition to whatever problems the WWE had with her as a worker, it was also the fact that she had put on a few pounds that helped to seal her fate. If that’s the case, then Awesome Kong will probably never get a chance in that company.

It’s one of the realities of the business. The demand for a guy to be in shape, especially in the WWE, seems to be pretty big. Granted, it’s not necessarily required for a guy to be ripped and tan to get a push, but one look at the top tier of the company tells you all you need to know.

John Cena, Triple H, Randy Orton. All three are muscled, toned, and built like Greek gods. While wrestlers are expected to be in good cardiovascular shape to endure long matches night in and night out, going the extra mile by living in the gym has always been an added plus.

But, of course, there are guys like Mick Foley, Big Show, and Mark Henry. Yes, Henry is thick with big arms, but he’s not exactly ripped. There are always exceptions to the rule.

For the Divas, however? Evidently, no exceptions are made.

As if the pressure to be gorgeous, with flawless skin and perfect hair aren’t enough, the WWE Divas also have to stay at a reasonable weight. If not, then that’s it. The WWE will say goodbye and wish them well in their future endeavors.

So, what is the solution? What does the WWE and TNA need to do in order to revitalize women’s wrestling in the eyes of the fans and improve the overall quality of the product?

I believe the real issue lies in the fact that the women are not pushed like the men.

Men sell the shows, there is no denying that. How? By having a locker room filled with good talent and one guy to be the face of the company.

In other words, the Divas need a John Cena.

One woman, one face, to sell the division, to put on a t-shirt, on a magazine cover, to build a pay per view around. This just doesn’t exist in the WWE, and really hasn’t since Trish.

The truth is, Alicia Fox is not the answer. Neither is Eve or Mayrse. Gail Kim is very good in the ring, but since coming back from TNA, she’s really not been given much. Beth Phoenix is also a good worker, but she inevitably suffers the same fate as those who came before her—she is pushed as far as the WWE feels a woman can go, and then she is pushed back down.

Again, TNA has the talent. Sarita, Taylor Wilde, Hamada, they can all definitely go in the ring. Why are they not being pushed to the forefront of the company?

I’m a fan of women’s wrestling. I enjoy a good women’s match as much as the men’s. Unlike some fans, I don’t watch hoping there will be a wardrobe malfunction or what skimpy ring gear will be worn.

I’m a wrestling fan. I want wrestling. Women in this business work hard to be taken seriously; they deserve their share of the spotlight. Unfortunately, in the WWE and TNA, they are being kept in the dark. And there’s nothing sexy about that.

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